Stephen King’s Book Sales Have Dropped 70 Percent Since He Went Woke

Steven King is learning the hard way that his decision to enter the world of the woke is a costly endeavor. Like most things on the left, King’s career is in ruins.

According to a new report, the author’s book sales are at an all-time low. “That’s really cutting into his income,” said publishing mogul Joe Barron, “and this is a guy who likes to live large.”

Our own investigative department did some research and found that year over year, Steven King’s sales are down more than 70 percent, at a cost of nearly $41 million over the course of the study.

“It’s not uncommon,” said ALLOD Correspondent Tara Newhole, “these wealthy liberals decide they have ‘enough to last a lifetime’ and throw the rest of their careers away.”

Newhole is correct. The intelligent entertainers like Scott Baio and the one woman who played Cara Dune until she got canceled know what it’s like to actually work for a living, and they’re on the right side of politics.

“I’ve lost work for being MAGA,” said Baio, “but it doesn’t compare to the fame and good will I’ve received from crowds of cultists at conservative ideology conventions. I got two pairs of panties and five pairs of briefs thrown at me at the last CPAC.”

Steven King could certainly learn a thing or two from Scott Baio. God Bless America.

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