US Women’s Team Says They’ll All Quit If Lia Thomas Gets a Tryout: “We Don’t Need a Ringer”

The 16 members of the US National Women’s Team say they’ll all quit if Lia Thomas, the transgender swimmer who won the NCAA Championship and set 11 world records, gets so much as a tryout.

“None of these women want to spend their locker room time looking at male genitals just for an advantage,” said Coach Joe Barron, “they’d rather win honestly than to have a ringer on the team.”

A ringer is described as someone far overqualified to compete in an event, typically involving sports. “They feel like the world will look down on them if they allow a biological male on their team.”

According to Thomas, there is no advantage and the reports of her dominance are “extremely exaggerated.” Yet there are all those records and medals.

A spokesman for the US Olympic committee responded to our request for comment, noting that they had no idea why the women’s volleyball team, the squad in the article’s feature image, would care if Lia Thomas got a tryout.

“I doubt she’d make it. She’s a swimmer. They don’t play a lot of volleyball.”

This reporter confirmed that in all the years of volleyball and swimming, never has someone trained in the 50-yeard dash won a medal. God Bless America.

Related Posts

Breaking: Tim Allen Joins Forces with Roseanne Barr for Her New CBS Sitcom

In a surprising and thrilling turn of events, the world of television comedy is set to welcome an iconic duo to its stage – Tim Allen and…

‘She’s Toxic’: Jason Aldean Leaves ‘The View’ After 10 Minutes Encounter With Whoopi Goldberg

Hold your horses, ladies and gentlemen! We have just witnessed the shortest debate in the history of ‘The View’! And no, it didn’t end because both sides…

Breaking: Colin Kaepernick Arrives Suited and Booted at Jets’ Stadium, Gets Kicked Out Immediately

The name Colin Kaepernick has become synonymous with both sports and social activism. His decision to take a knee during the national anthem in protest of racial…

“Get Some Professional Help”: Bill Maher Throws Whoopi Goldberg Out Of His Show

In a turn of events that left viewers agog, Bill Maher, the irreverent host of “Real Time with Bill Maher,” decided to put on a show-stopping performance…

Elon Musk: ‘Woke Mind Virus Should Be Destroyed Just Like Bud Light’

In a startling twist of events, Tesla CEO and Twitter’s newest kingpin, Elon Musk, has drawn an analogy that is as unusual as his regular tweets. He…

Breaking: Snoop Dog Barks Back at CMT, Backs Aldean by Ending His Own Contract

Once upon a time in the bustling world of music and television, an unsuspecting CMT had yanked a popular Jason Aldean song off their network. Little did…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *